Unlimited Website Traffic: March 2013

Sunday, March 31, 2013

Bad Love Advice: 9 Lessons To Unlearn

Love rom-coms, love songs and breakup songs? There are a few lessons they teach us we might be better off without.

Loading Slideshow

The whole "You complete me/You had me at hello" scene in “Jerry Maguire” is a big old lesson in what not to believe about relationships. First of all, Tom Cruise's Jerry was a pretty crappy husband, so Renee's Dorothy definitely needed more than "Hello" as an explanation. Plus, the whole idea of completing another person isn't exactly healthy. As YouBeauty Relationship Expert David Sbarra, Ph.D., says, "We get messages about happy endings, soul mates and destiny. In this way, pop culture ideas -- while fun to engage in and with for a bit -- can cast a huge shadow over real-life relationships." (Photo: Amazon)

Ladies, we can all move past the, "Save me, my handsome prince!" mentality, right? Let's all agree to be a little more Merida (from “Brave”) and a little less Sleeping Beauty … and raise our daughters to do the same. (Photo: Amazon)

"Love means never having to say you're sorry" is the most famous line from “Love Story,” the tragic tale of WASP-y Oliver Barrett and working class Jenny Cavalleri. But seriously, what does that even mean? Sorry, but love is all about having to apologize -- not for being who you are, mind you, but compromise is key. "Even the happiest and most successful couples fight and sometimes quite a lot, but they're fighting for their relationship," says Sbarra. "If we see a fight as a sign that things aren't ‘meant to be,’ we're only ever engaging a fantasy relationship." (Photo: Amazon)

Both Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey are playing games to try to NOT end up in a relationship. And yet somehow they still manage to fall in love and work through all their lies without much drama. Well, there is a motorcycle/cab chase, but the emotional part is pretty darn easy! Sbarra is right yet again in saying that rom-coms portray love as something that magically "works out.” "This causes two problems,” he explains. “First, we come to think we're defective if things don't work out. And second, we come to see the hard work of making a relationship successful as indicators that something is wrong." Amen. (Photo: Amazon)

Every hard-hearted, gruff loner is not actually an awesome person who will love you forever underneath it all. But the movies would have you believe otherwise. See: Edwards (both Cullen from “Twilight” and Richard Gere's character in “Pretty Woman”); or Mr. Big (though at least his flaws showed more frequently). Just remember that dark and angsty can also turn out like the philandering Don Draper.

Stranger Danger is real, but not in rom-coms. And definitely not for Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks. Whether Tom’s creeping on Meg (in “Mail”) or vice versa (in “Sleepless”), I think we can agree that in the real world, these stalker-ish tendencies would freak us out. (Photo: Amazon)

If only it was as easy to get over a breakup as Taylor Swift, Blake Shelton or the myriad of country stars make it sound in their songs. "I think country music is terrific but that it can do a disservice for some people," says Sbarra. "A lot of the music is about loss and breakups, but one of the messages is that it might be fairly easy to get over a breakup by having a few beers with your friends. In this way, people again see themselves as defective if they don't or can't have a beer and 'get over it.'"

From “Grease” to “Bridget Jones” to “She's All That,” we've been bombarded with scene after scene of changing appearances being the successful way to finally get the guy to notice you. Is there anything more infuriating, perhaps because there may be a grain of truth to this one? We stand behind being who you are, always! (Photo: Amazon)

Reese Witherspoon's good girl Annette loses her virginity to Sebastian in a pretty romantic way, even though his initial intentions were, well, cruel. It's all sweet and set to the Counting Crows with lyrics that even say, "I am ready …" Let's see a show of hands of whose experience was that lovely … especially in high school. Nope, usually it's more along the lines of the Taylor Swift lyrics "Abigail gave everything she had to a boy, who changed his mind. We both cried …" Well, at least she got that one right! (Photo: Amazon)

Learn how to have high-quality, meaningful and empowered relationships.

For more on love, click here.

Get Alerts

View the original article here

Spooked Sleeping? Identifying Nightmares And Their Causes

By Laura McMullen for U.S. News

You wake up, panting, from a deep sleep. You went to work naked. You fell into a bottomless pit. You got swept into a tornado, and then fought off a wicked witch and flying monkeys in an unfruitful trek to Oz. If any of this sounds familiar, join the club. Research suggests that more than 85 percent of adults occasionally experience nightmares -- at least once a month for 8 to 29 percent, and once a week for 2 to 6 percent. If you're someone who snoozes peacefully through the night, understand that nightmares are no ordinary dreams. They're "vivid, disturbing dreams, with an emotional connection that tends to wake us up," says Matthew Mingrone, an otolaryngologist and lead physician for EOS Sleep California centers.

If your slumber resembles a bad horror movie, learning about your nightmares and why they happen may help you sleep better.

Nightmares vs. Sleep Terrors
First, recognize that nightmares are not night terrors. The latter, also known as sleep terrors, happen earlier in sleep, during a non-rapid eye movement (REM) stage. Typically, you'd wake up in the first 90 minutes of sleep, perhaps panicked and yelling, with a much fuzzier memory of the dream than you'd have after a nightmare. Your heart rate may jump to 180 beats per minute during night terrors, says Tore Nielsen, director of the Dream and Nightmare Laboratory and a psychiatry professor at the University of Montreal. He adds that folks with night terrors can be destructive when they wake up -- by fighting or jumping from windows -- and yet, they often don't remember the episode later.

If the idea of sleep terrors sounds, well, nightmarish, at least it's only a reality for about 4 or 5 percent of adults. For the 85 percent of us who get plain old nightmares, you know the drill. "Nightmares occur primarily in the last third of the night, when your REM sleep is the strongest," Nielsen says. So if you go to bed at 10, a night terror would wake you with a fright around 11:30 p.m., whereas a nightmare would haunt you closer to 6 a.m. Sometimes nightmares wake us up, and sometimes they don't, but we can almost always remember the nightmare's plot to some extent.

What Causes Nightmares, And Who Gets Them?
"There are post-traumatic dreams, and there are idiopathic ones, which means we really don't know where they come from," says Nielsen. "It hasn't been scientifically documented very well." Generally, idiopathic nightmares don't reflect traumas, but perhaps intra-personal relationships, like those with spouses or parents, Nielsen adds.

Stress and anxiety can also lead to nightmares, says Mingrone. Job losses, break-ups, failed tests -- although they're not considered traumas per say, these stressful events can all trigger a bout of bad dreams.

Nightmares have also been linked to certain medications, specifically those that affect neurotransmitter levels, such as antidepressents, narcotics, or barbiturates, according to a 2000 report in American Family Physician. People with depression, those relapsing from schizophrenia, and those experiencing withdrawal from alcohol and sedative-hypnotics may also face a higher risk.

There's another crew of nightmare-prone people that the report mentions: "Creative persons who demonstrate 'thin boundaries' on psychologic tests." Nielsen deciphers: "For some people, their mental boundaries are thinner in that they have much more access to their imaginative and emotional lives."

Getting Back To Sleep (If You Can)
"I don't think you can get back to sleep immediately, because you might be emotionally aroused quite a bit, or afraid," says Nielsen, adding that, if you do try to reclaim a few zzz's, evoke whatever relaxation techniques you know, like deep breathing and progressive muscle relaxation. Or "meditate on positive experiences," Mingrone suggests.

If it's clear you're too wound up to fall back asleep anytime soon, it may be best to get up for a half hour or so. "It couldn't hurt to write down the nightmare so you can reflect on it later," Nielson says, or "try to re-script the nightmare so it's more to your liking."

Treatment
Only about five percent of adults have a clinical problem with nightmares, in that the dreams are so frequent and/or severe that they seek help. "It's really a question of how much distress it's causing," Nielson says. If the nightmares are regularly disturbing your sleep, then you should probably visit a sleep clinic, where specialists can diagnose if your only problem is nightmares, or if you have something more serious, like sleep apnea.

"Sleep deprivation is like having a loan out from the bank," says Mingrone. "You've got to pay the sleep debt back."

For some, relief may come not from a sleep clinic, but from a psychologist's office. "The best way to avoid nightmares is to deal with any underlying anxiety problems," Nielson says. The deep dark secret; the car crash that scarred you; the wicked aunt-turned witch -- if these stressors are seeping into your dreams and disrupting precious REM sleep, it may be worth hashing it out consciously, with a specialist.

At the end of the day, or rather, at the end of the scary night, most people don't need or want treatment for nightmares. In fact, many don't mind them. "Often people come in and say [their nightmares] are a source of creativity or they're quite interested in them." Nielson says. "They don't want to lose them."

Earlier on HuffPost:

Get Alerts

View the original article here

'Being Mandela': Nelson Mandela's Granddaughters Bring An Icon's Legacy To Reality TV (VIDEO)

The last time Zaziwe Dlamini-Manaway saw South Africa's infamous Robben Island penitentiary, she was just 8 months old and being smuggled in by a prison guard to see her grandfather. For many years, she couldn't imagine making a trip back.

"We didn't want to go for years and years, because that's where my grandfather was," Zaziwe, now 35, told The Huffington Post. "It was a painful place and we didn't want to relive it," she said, recalling the return visit she eventually made, along with her sister Swati Dlamini, 33, and other siblings.

Their grandfather, 94-year-old civil rights icon Nelson Mandela, hasn't heard about the emotions the women's trip to his old prison cell evoked, though he may when an episode of their reality TV show, "Being Mandela," airs on the NBC-affiliated Cozi TV in the coming weeks.

The 13-episode series, which premieres Sunday on the eve of the anniversary of Nelson Mandela's release from prison 23 years ago, doesn't only show viewers what life for a Mandela in South Africa is like today; it also helps Zaziwe and Swati understand their own legacy better.

According to the sisters, who grew up in exile in Boston with their parents, there were some reminders of the struggle raging in their home country, but for the most part, their parents kept them sheltered from the harsh realities that their famous grandparents and fellow South Africans had to endure.

"There were always reminders of the fact that far away, back at home, there are people who were fighting for the liberation of the country. So there are certain things that we wouldn't do as a family," Swati explained. "We would never put up a Christmas tree. [Our mother would say], 'We have no reason to celebrate. Once your grandfather gets out of prison, if he ever does get out of prison, then we can celebrate.' Even my sister's birthday -- June 16th, which is Youth Activist Day for us and the liberation struggle -- we couldn't celebrate. She never got a present on her actual birthday until my grandfather got out of prison."

These are sacrifices that Swati noted pale in comparison to those made by her grandparents -- and to the moment she realized just what their legacy meant.

"I remember coming back to South Africa when my grandfather was released, driving up Vilakazi Street," Swati said. "There were hundreds and thousands of people lined up on both sides of the road. They literally hung out for the entire time we were there -- two or three weeks -- and they didn't move. I was just like, 'Wow! Is this all for my grandfather?' That's the first recollection I [have] where I thought, 'OK, this is big. People really admire this man, and he's been such a huge inspiration for so many people.'"

Still, around Swati's and Zaziwe's homes, Nelson Mandela is "Granddad" and their grandmother, Winnie Mandela, is "Big Mommy." And when Zaziwe gives birth to her third child in episode one of "Being Mandela," none other than Big Mommy is on hand to help give him a name.

"She literally is the one who's responsible for naming everybody in the family," Zaziwe said, "so she was there when I had Zen, and it was an honor."

As for Swati, she is spearheading the publication of her grandmother's prison diary. In 1969, Winnie Mandela became one of the first detainees under Section 6 of South Africa's notorious Terrorism Act, serving 18 months in solitary confinement at Pretoria Central before being charged under the Suppression of Communism Act.

"It was such an eye-opener for me, the depths to which she describes her personal experiences and what she went through every day in prison, not being fed ... For two years she didn't see her children," said Swati. "As I'm going down this journey, I'll come home and ask my mom, 'Do you know this is what Big Mommy had to go through when she was in solitary confinement? Where were you guys?' And she would say, 'Sweetie, you know, we were just taken in by different people here and there. Our own family members didn't want to take us in because we were seen as such high risk.' We're going back into a place and a time where I think for a very long time we'd just shut off. We're facing a lot of those things now."

Remembering the past is crucial. "We're fortunate to look back, and February is a significant month for us," Swati said, adding that while the U.S. is celebrating Black History Month now, South Africa has its own Human Rights Month in March to acknowledge the country's struggle for human dignity.

But Nelson Mandela's granddaughters insist on writing the next chapter in their own way.

"To be able to be in a position as a woman to choose if I want to go into entertainment -- I'm fortunate that my grandmother did that for me. She fought, she was in solitary confinement for 18 months so that I can sit here and I can have this choice and live it out as I please," Swati said.

"We're looking back at our history to say look how far we've come, as a country, as a nation ... and we're excited about continuing the legacy, but we're doing it in our own way," she added.

One of those ways is a clothing line named after their grandfather's autobiography, Long Walk to Freedom. The line of apparel, which the sisters launched with their two younger brothers and which draws inspiration from their grandfather's famous Madiba shirts, is the primary focus of Zaziwe and Swati's work days. Running the business is also a major theme on the duo's reality show, giving the series the kind of sibling rivalry and semi-scripted adventures that reality TV is known for.

The sisters declare, nonetheless, that their show isn't your average reality TV. "Like every family, there's a bit of drama here and there, but we're very respectful of our name and we're very respectful of our grandparent's legacy and we're very mindful of that. In anything that we try to do, we always try to maintain the integrity of the family," Swati said.

The show also helps to portray Africa in a more positive light, Zaziwe added. "Most people think of Africa as one big country ... but the continent is so massive and this is just one aspect," she said. "We'll show that, Jesus, we've come so far after apartheid, we live in nice homes, we go to nice restaurants, the scenery is beautiful, it's safe ... this is a different side. It's not a travel show, but you'll see."

"Being Mandela" premieres on Cozi TV on Sunday, Feb. 10, at 9 p.m. ET. Watch a clip from the show in the video above.

Loading Slideshow

Zaziwe Dlamini-Manaway and her daughter (left) and Swati Dlamini and her daughter (right) flank their mother, Zenani Mandela Dlamini, and their grandfather, Nelson Mandela.

Swati Dlamini points to the number "67" on her grandfather Nelson Mandela's sweater. "On some of our apparel, we incorporate the number 67 because our grandfather dedicated 67 years of his life to the struggle," Swati told The Huffington Post.

Nelson Mandela "is doing very well," one of his granddaughters recently told the Associated Press. Mandela, 94, spent much of December in the hospital, where he was treated for a lung infection and gallstones.

Zaziwe and Swati gather with their grandmother, Winnie Mandela, and other family members. "My mom has four kids -- the two of us and two younger brothers -- and then we have stepbrothers and stepsisters," Zaziwe told The Huffington Post. "We're eight in total and we're all very close."

Related on HuffPost:

View the original article here

Pilgram Nuclear Power Plant Shut Down: Blizzard Forces Massachusetts Power Station To Shut Down

PLYMOUTH, Mass. -- The Nuclear Regulatory Commission says a power plant in Massachusetts has lost power and shut down during a massive snowstorm.

The NRC says the Pilgrim Nuclear Power Plant in Plymouth experienced an automatic shutdown at around 9:15 p.m. Friday after losing off-site power. Spokesman Neil Sheehan says the plant has declared an unusual event, which is the lowest level of emergency classification.

Sheehan says that the reactor shut down without any problems and that backup generators are powering plant equipment.

The NRC says there's no threat to public safety.

The shutdown came as a major snowstorm began clobbering the New York-to-Boston corridor, knocking out power to more than 300,000 customers in Massachusetts.

Related on HuffPost:

View the original article here

Sex Lies: 'The Normal Bar' Reveals What Partners Fib About

Excerpted from the book THE NORMAL BAR. Copyright © 2013 by Chrisanna Northrup, Pepper Schwartz, and James Witte. Published by Harmony, an Imprint of the Crown Publishing Group, a division of Random House, Inc. The Normal Bar is the world's most extensive survey on romantic relationships, polling over 100,000 people and collecting over 1 million data points. The survey was conducted in 2011 using a powerful interactive survey tool called OnQ with the help of media partners The Huffington Post, Reader's Digest, AARP, iVillage, & AOL.

The Normal Bar data show us that even in good relationships, trust is shaky. Having complete and total confidence in a partner seems to be a struggle for most of us.

Do you trust your partner?
Only 39% of women in this study completely trust their partners, compared to 53% of men. What’s wrong with this picture? Why the gender difference, and why the low levels of trust in general? It may be that a lot of couples intuitively know or have learned by experience that their spouse or live-in partner has the potential to rove.

Women in heterosexual relationships know the same thing that many studies have shown: that men are more interested in and titillated about sex outside the relationship, and that may account for a higher percentage of women who doubt their partner’s honesty and fidelity. On the other hand, nearly half of men suspect their partners, too. Both men and women believe that their partners will hide unpleasant truths, and that they may have to dig to find out what is really going on.

Have you ever lied to your partner?
Nearly three-quarters of our respondents (75% of men and 71% of women) said they lie to their partners to one degree or another. Only 27% of our respondents said they never ever lie. Does lying negatively affect the quality of your relationship? Probably not. Even among extremely happy couples, 69% of men and women said they’ve lied at some point to their partners.

But the fact that very happy partners lie demands some further scrutiny. For most couples, some lying is necessary to keep the peace, to protect each other’s feelings, and to preserve a sense of safety in the relationship. The 27% who never lie may be righteous, but they can also be cruelly frank. Men and women who shade the truth may be more loving and protective. Even well-intentioned lies, however, can hurt the relationship if the truth that’s withheld is something the partner has every right and need to know. Knowing when a lie is reasonable and when it is reprehensible isn’t always an easy call.

Do you lie about your feelings?
Relationships are supposed to be open, sharing, and honest. But 59% of men and 56% of women lie about their feelings. Half of all partners not only stifle their emotions but also give misleading feedback about what’s going on in their head and heart. As you might guess, people who are less happy lie the most. In fact, 72% of unhappy partners choose not to share their true feelings with their partners. Whether this emotional deception is a cause or an effect of the overall unhappiness, it makes it very difficult to fix the relationship. The surprising finding, however, is that 48% of extremely happy partners also lie about their feelings.

Do you lie about your partner’s sexual performance?
Just as men are more likely to tell white lies about their partner’s appearance, women are more likely to flatter their partner’s sexual performance. We found that 43% of women lie about how they feel about their partner’s sexual performance, compared to just 28% of men. That’s probably not because women are better lovers but, rather, because they feel a greater need to protect their partner’s feelings. When a man feels insecure, he may have difficulty getting an erection, so it’s in his partner’s—as well as his—interest to boost his sexual self-esteem. The bad news here is that some honest communication has to take place; otherwise, nothing is likely to improve.

As you might imagine, sexually dissatisfied men and women lie almost twice as much (50%) as sexually satisfied partners (27%). If you talk openly and honestly with your partner about what isn’t working, you’re much more likely to achieve sexual satisfaction than if you salve your partner’s sexual feelings at the expense of your own pleasure. Lying may cause fewer storms, but also fewer orgasms!

Have you read your partner’s e-mail?
Privacy seems to be in jeopardy. More than half (54%) of women and 49% of men read their partner’s e-mail! It doesn’t matter if they’re happy or unhappy with their relationships, either. Anyone, it seems, can be tempted to sneak a peek at private messages.

It may be that a lot of couples keep their computers open and their e-mail accessible. However, that doesn’t constitute an open invitation. One man said, “I caught my girlfriend going through my e-mail and I went wild. How dare she do that! It just eroded any trust I had in her. We broke up over it. When I started dating Georgia [his wife] I told her about that incident because I wanted to make sure she knew how strongly I felt about my privacy.”

Have you ever lied about where you’ve been?
A full half of all men and 36% of women said they sometimes lie about where they’ve been and what they’ve been doing. One of these respondents explained, “I have to admit, I lie by omission a lot of the time. For example, I don’t tell Henry when I see my ex. He really doesn’t like him and I think he thinks I’ve still got a thing for him. I don’t, but I do want to keep a friendship going. So I either don’t tell Henry or I tell him I am with my girlfriends when I am really meeting my ex for dinner.”

Want to learn more about what’s normal? Order your copy of The Normal Bar today at www.thenormalbar.com, and stay tuned for more excerpts from The Normal Bar in the coming weeks.

Related on HuffPost:

View the original article here

Boston Blizzard: Northeast Snowed In As 'Nemo' Barrels Through

BOSTON — A behemoth storm packing hurricane-force wind gusts and blizzard conditions swept through the Northeast on Saturday, dumping more than 2 feet of snow on New England and knocking out power to 650,000 homes and businesses.

More than 28 inches of snow had fallen on central Connecticut by early Saturday, and areas of southeastern Massachusetts, Rhode Island and New Hampshire notched 2 feet or more of snow – with more falling. Airlines scratched more than 5,300 flights through Saturday, and New York City's three major airports and Boston's Logan Airport closed.

The wind-whipped snowstorm mercifully arrived at the start of a weekend, which meant fewer cars on the road and extra time for sanitation crews to clear the mess before commuters in the New York-to-Boston region of roughly 25 million people have to go back to work. But it also could mean a weekend cooped up indoors.

The U.S. Postal Service closed post offices and suspended mail delivery on Saturday in all of New England.

In Maine, officials said numerous vehicles, including several state police cars, were stuck in deep snow and warned stranded drivers to expect long waits for tow trucks or other assistance.

For a group of stranded European business travelers, the snow meant making the best of downtime in a hotel restaurant Friday night in downtown Boston, where snow blew outside and drifted several inches deep on the sidewalks.

The six Santander bank employees found their flights back to Spain canceled, and they gave up on seeing the city or having dinner out.

"We are not believing it," said Tommaso Memeghini, 29, an Italian who lives in Barcelona. "We were told it may be the biggest snowstorm in the last 20 years."

The National Weather Service says up to 3 feet of snow is expected in Boston, threatening the city's 2003 record of 27.6 inches. A wind gust of 76 mph was recorded at Logan Airport.

In heavily Catholic Boston, the archdiocese urged parishioners to be prudent about attending Sunday Mass and reminded them that, under church law, the obligation "does not apply when there is grave difficulty in fulfilling this obligation."

Halfway through what had been a mild winter across the Northeast, blizzard warnings were posted from parts of New Jersey to Maine. The National Weather Service said Boston could get close to 3 feet of snow by Saturday evening, while most of Rhode Island could receive more than 2 feet, most of it falling overnight Friday into Saturday. Connecticut was bracing for 2 feet, and New York City was expecting as much as 14 inches.

Early snowfall was blamed for a 19-car pileup in Cumberland, Maine, that caused minor injuries. In New York, hundreds of cars began getting stuck on the Long Island Expressway on Friday afternoon at the beginning of the snowstorm and dozens of motorists remained disabled early Saturday as police worked to free them.

About 650,000 customers in the Northeast lost power during the height of the snowstorm, most of them in Massachusetts and Rhode Island. The Pilgrim Nuclear Power Plant in Plymouth, Mass., lost electricity and shut down Friday night during the storm. Authorities say there's no threat to public safety.

At least four deaths were being blamed on the storm, three in Canada and one in New York. In southern Ontario, an 80-year-old woman collapsed while shoveling her driveway and two men were killed in car crashes. In New York, a 74-year-old man died after being struck by a car in Poughkeepsie; the driver said she lost control in the snowy conditions, police said.

Forecasters said wind gusts exceeding 75 mph could cause more widespread power outages and whip the snow into fearsome drifts. Flooding was expected along coastal areas still recovering from Superstorm Sandy, which hit New York and New Jersey the hardest and is considered Jersey's worst natural disaster.

In Manhattan, streets normally bustling after midnight, were quiet Saturday but for the hum of snow blowers, the scrape of shovels and the laughter from late night revelers who braved the snow.

Bill Tavonallo, 39, said he walked home on purpose from a Manhattan bar to enjoy the snow falling.

"With Sandy, we were scared. But this is wonderful," he said, his glasses crusted with ice. "It's nice to have a reason to slow down."

In Massachusetts, Gov. Deval Patrick enacted a statewide driving ban for the first time since the Blizzard of `78, a ferocious storm that dropped 27 inches of snow, packed hurricane-force winds and claimed dozens of lives.

In New York, Fashion Week, a series of designer showings with some activities held under tents, went on mostly as scheduled, though organizers put on additional crews to deal with the snow and ice, turned up the heat and fortified the tents. The snow did require some wardrobe changes: Designer Michael Kors was forced to arrive at the Project Runway show in Uggs.

For Joe DeMartino, of Fairfield, Conn., being overprepared for the weather was impossible: His wife was expecting their first baby Sunday. He stocked up on gas and food, got firewood ready and was installing a baby seat in the car. The couple also packed for the hospital.

"They say that things should clear up by Sunday. We're hoping that they're right," he said.

Said his wife, Michelle: "It adds an element of excitement."

___

Associated Press writers John Christoffersen in Fairfield, Conn., Samantha Critchell and Colleen Long in New York and Sylvia Wingfield in Boston contributed to this report.

Get Alerts

View the original article here

Julian Assange Bill Maher Interview: WikiLeaks Founder Slams Drones, Targeted Killings

WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange weighed in on the brewing controversy surrounding the Obama administration's targeted killing program Friday night during an appearance on "Real Time With Bill Maher."

Assange railed against the revelation, made by NBC News earlier this week, that the U.S. government reserves the right to extrajudicially kill U.S. citizens, as long as they are perceived to be "imminent" terror threats -- with "imminence" being given an especially broad definition.

Said Assange:

You can be killed by someone in the White House, the president on down, completely arbitrary reasons. You won't know you're on the kill list until you're dead.
Lawyers, if you have a suspicion you might be on this kill list, they can't even represent you. That was the case for our lawyers, the Center for Constitutional Rights, trying to represent Anwar Al-Awlaki -- who was discovered to be on that kill list, and his son -- wasn't even allowed to be his lawyer, because he was part of a proscribed organization.

Anwar Al-Awlaki was an alleged al Qaeda militant whose assassination by drone strike in 2011 engendered a significant amount of controversy, as Awlaki was a U.S. citizen. His 16-year-old son, Abdulrahman, who was also a U.S. citizen, was killed two weeks later in a separate drone strike in Yemen.

Assange continued to hammer away at the U.S. government, saying:

...[W]hen an executive can kill its own citizens arbitrarily at will, in secret, without any of the decision making becoming public, without even the rules of procedure, without even the laws behind it being public -- that's why we need organizations like WikiLeaks.

Assange spoke with Maher from the Ecuadorian embassy in London, where he has been living for several months. The WikiLeaks founder faces rape charges in Sweden, which he denies.

Also on HuffPost:

Get Alerts

View the original article here

Megan Smolenyak: Hey, Prince, Your Roots Are Showing

Megan Smolenyak: Hey, Prince, Your Roots Are Showing HPFB.init();

HuffPost's QuickRead...ShareBox.ad = function (tag_id){if ($(tag_id) == undefined) return; if ($(tag_id).innerHTML != '') return;ad_spec = {"zone_info": "huffpost.celebrity","ord": 1360417245,"tile": 3,"width": 300,"height": 250,"el_id": tag_id + "_js","class_name": "ad_block ad_wide top","type": "iframe"}HuffPoUtil.WEDGJE.write(ad_spec, tag_id);};Loading... HuffPost's QuickRead...

Snooki iPhone app iPad app Android phone app Android tablet app More Log in Create Account Notifications Profile Settings Logout #topnav_margin_btm { margin:0 !important } February 9, 2013

Featuring fresh takes and real-time analysis from HuffPost's signature lineup of contributorsHot on the BlogSen. Barbara Boxer Tim Ferriss David Frum John Cusack HuffPost Social Reading

Some error occurred Login with Facebook to see what your friends are reading Enable Social Reading i

Settings Read Share Settings Learn More

Megan SmolenyakGenealogy Expert, Author of "Hey, America, Your Roots Are Showing" & "Who Do You Think You Are?"

GET UPDATES FROM Megan Smolenyak Like 77 Hey, Prince, Your Roots Are Showing Posted: 02/08/2013 11:00 pm Follow

Michelle Obama , Black History , Music , African Americans , Breakfast Can Wait , Cory Booker , Family Tree , Great Migration , Prince Rogers Nelson , Life & Times , Burr Oak , Genealogy , Louisiana , Minnesota , Prince , Slavery , Twins , Celebrity News
#news_entries #ad_sharebox_260x60 img {padding:0px;margin:0px} share this story Submit this storydigg reddit stumble

Prince Rogers Nelson, better known simply as Prince, has the music world intrigued with the series of singles he's been releasing -- most recently, Breakfast Can Wait. Will a full-fledged album be far behind? We can only hope. But while we're in wait-and-see mode, I thought I'd take a peek into his past -- and by that, I mean his pre-Minnesota, pre-purple, ancestral past. Here are a few of the discoveries I found scattered in the branches of his family tree:

Among the surnames that appear in Prince's family tree are Bonnell, Brooks, Hardy, Head, Jenkins, Nelson, Phillips and Shaw, so those sharing these names could be related.

As with other gifted musicians such as Beyoncé and Jay-Z, Prince has a concentration of Louisiana roots. In fact, all four of his grandparents were born there, though Minnesota, Georgia, and Arkansas can also claim a piece of his heritage.

Twins run on both sides of Prince's family. His mother was one, and there were also twins in the Nelson branch on his father's side.

Due to the Great Migration, his once mostly Louisiana-based family dispersed to Arkansas, Iowa, Illinois, Minnesota, New Jersey and Tennessee. His maternal grandfather, a Pullman porter named Frank Shaw, went north to Minnesota by way of Iowa. Though this might sound like a peculiar route, this same pattern can be seen in the family tree of Cory Booker, whose ancestors were drawn from the South to Iowa for mining jobs. And as a result of all this meandering, one of Prince's great-uncles is buried at Burr Oak on the outskirts of Chicago, the same notorious cemetery where one of Michelle Obama's uncles is buried.

Prince's paternal grandfather had 11 children by two wives over a 36-year period. This grandfather's parents also had 11 children, but in a more concentrated 14-year period. 22 offspring from just these two generations means that Prince undoubtedly has dozens, if not hundreds, of Nelson cousins in both Arkansas and Minnesota.

Six of Prince's eight great-grandparents were born into slavery, and as was unfortunately so common, one of his great-grandmothers was apparently the daughter of her one-time owner.

Within Louisiana, Prince has roots in Claiborne, Webster, Bienville and Lincoln Parishes. More specifically, the towns of Homer, Cotton Valley, Arcadia and Vienna, are all ancestral hometowns for the Purple One.

1880 marriage of Ed Nelson to Emma Hardy, Claiborne Parish, LouisianaOne of his great-great-grandmothers could be considered a 19th century version of a cougar. After her first marriage, she took a second husband less than half her age. Her new, teen-aged husband was only five years older than his eldest stepchild. Even so, she managed to outlive him. This Blogger's Books from

Hey, America, Your Roots Are Showing
by Megan Smolenyak

Who Do You Think You Are?: The Essential Guide to Tracing Your Family History
by Megan Smolenyak, Wall to Wall Media

Follow Megan Smolenyak on Twitter:www.twitter.com/megansmolenyak

FOLLOW CELEBRITY Like 92k Get Alerts #ad_bottom_article_text {margin-bottom: 15px} Cory Booker Michelle Obama Louisiana Music

ahmed Photo: Prince Turki al-Faisal sits next to his son Abdulaziz after he survived an accident during a cars race in Riyadh http://t.co/OBYJAjF1 2 hours ago from TweetDeck

MaryamK1982 Never been so happy to receive an email @princessnjd x 3 hours ago from Twitter for iPhone

nationalpost From @fullcomment: George Jonas: Brand new rights, courtesy the Prince of Darkness http://t.co/RMDQfm2T 9 hours ago from dlvr.it

audubonsociety Princeton University researchers have revealed a key piece of math behind how Starlings form flock formations http://t.co/sbU8AC64 11 hours ago from HootSuite

MaryamK1982 @Princessnjd @sumner_lauren yeah yeah that place I frequent often with my vast skiing experience...Verbier lol 14 hours ago from Twitter for iPhone

GrahamEvansMP RT @CheshireFire: @CheshireFire seeks @PrincesTrust Team Members in Northwich - http://t.co/hNx8Q6h3 14 hours ago from Twitter for iPad

sarahdessen Did not wear Princess dress to dinner, but did sidewalk dance w/my girl in front of 411. Got some looks, but no matter. Dance when you can! 14 hours ago from Twitter for iPhone

rumhud Yes, as a matter of fact, I am cracking these damn things open for our pretty princess chinchillas. http://t.co/lHeFeaw8 15 hours ago from Instagram

sundersays RT @Yyadiloh: No to all male panels. A very interesting equalities initiative by the IPPR: http://t.co/BEjLOJNB via @princesaprai 15 hours ago from Twitter for BlackBerry®

thegarance Is there a dragon and a princess in the #Obamaquester? Or just a very sharp sword? 17 hours ago from web

martharotter Listening to new PRINCE SONG on nialler9 blog - YES! "Breakfast Can Wait" -- http://t.co/iWQxJudk 19 hours ago from TweetDeck

MaryamK1982 Was in the flat of @princessnjd for 20 seconds....spotted these n they're now almost gone #oops #greedy http://t.co/MQKG6BAy 19 hours ago from Twitter for iPhone

MaryamK1982 Looking forward to going to my first rugby match tonight @princessnjd x 20 hours ago from Twitter for iPhone

Metrolink AV Line Metrolink Train 210 to Los Angeles delayed 10 minutes out of Via Princessa due to late turn. 21 hours ago from HootSuite

sarahdessen Daughter is in habit of wearing Princess dresses out to Friday dinner. Tonight she wants me to dress up as well. Ummm.... 21 hours ago from Twitter for iPhone

stuartmillar159 RT @ArwaM: Brilliant PR idea. It has prob raised their brand awareness 1000% Expect the next storm to be called Prince Eric 21 hours ago from TweetDeck

annsrants Become part of the @ltymshow community "For More Than One Season" --by @princessmikkimo http://t.co/iDUbPlBo 21 hours ago from HootSuite

DavidKenner Saudi Prince Muqrin is interested in moon-landing conspiracies. http://t.co/H0s8P22k 22 hours ago from TweetDeck

businessinsider Bloomberg Stayed At One of Prince Charles' Estates And He Did Not Care For It by @lopezlinette http://t.co/JsC2LnJl 22 hours ago from Business Insider

FLefebvre_UMP Le petit Prince...;+) @GTabard:1 an après la mort de Pierre Sudreau, le livre subtil et personnel "Chambre S 10" que @beache3 lui a consacr 22 hours ago from Twitter for iPhone Show more results TOP INFLUENCERS ON THIS TOPIC